I feel fine up here on Cloud Nine!

Just met with the docs...

Praise the Lord everything went excellently wonderfully well!

It was indeed a Meningioma, NO CANCER!

They could have gotten a little more of the tumor but being it was benign they didn't want to compromise the sinus so there is no CPAP danger!

She is going into recovery now so we will see how that goes. They didn't go to the other side at all so smell nerves over there aren't compromised and not much of the other so it's very likely intact, we'll find out when she awakes and she smells her shoes (or I'll find some air freshener...

Gotta go....love you all!!!!

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Love Will Hold Us Together

This is the first day of the rest of your life.

Just over an hour ago I released her into the custody of the surgical team. They all say they are going to take real good care of her and I truly believe that.

It's been a long road, with both soft shoulders and dangerous curves. We drove out here on the Endonasal Highway and God put up a big detour sign at the last moment to keep us from going over the cliff. Now we're on the Eyebrow Express and all the lanes are clear. We knew that if this was the wrong road God would be there in the crosswalk with the big stop sign and redirect.

"God never promised He would inform us ahead of time all about His plan. He's just promised He has one. Ultimately, it's for our good and His glory." -Swindoll

Some medical things to pray about, potential concerns, to bring before you, especially you FPF's, you know who you are: There is still a concern about inter-cranial pressure, much less with this procedure than the other, but still a concern. They may have to put in a lumbar drain and eventually a permanent inter-cranial shunt to relieve the pressure. Please pray for NO SHUNT and NO LUMBAR DRAIN. Also it's quite possible she'll be intubated overnight if her breathing doesn't pick up right away coming out of general anesthesia, which means the kids might not see her awake tonight. And also her friend from Seattle, her tumor caused her to lose her eyesight on the left side, pray it's only temporary.

How am I doing? Glad you asked. I'm okay with this. I feel at peace with the road we're on right now. I feel I am spiritually prepared and the Lord has provided shelter from the storm. I am delighted that I was given the task of documenting her story, though she wants me to remind everyone that these are my words, she would probably tell the story differently. In fact she has only read the first post. Maybe she'll add some of her own words in the coming weeks.

The last few weeks Dana would often smell something like the lilacs blooming, or a row of air fresheners at the market and wonder if it would be the last time. As she headed into the O.R. I put her beach sandals in the same bag as her clothes and she said "Now my clothes will smell like the ocean"; I replied "let's hope they do."

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Contraindication of Endonasal Procedure

I know it sounds like the title of a '70s Psychedelic album but that is actually the final report.

Dana's apnea is still pretty bad so that procedure is not an option. The post-surgery dangers far outweigh the ability to find out if the tumor is cancer or not.

We have decided to go to the "Eyebrow Approach" in that a small incision is place in the area of her right eyebrow and they go in through there instead of the nose. Benefits are easier recovery, greater potential for saving sense of smell, and no death by CPAP. They will only be able to get to 90%  of the tumor though but they are 98% sure it is Meningioma, but at least we will know for sure and we can go from there.

Waiting completely will probably not help because 1) obviously we won't know what it is and b) her apnea will probably not get any better in 6-12 months.

So that's it for now. Surgery scheduled for 1pm tomorrow, June 2. Happy Birthday Kevin! (BTW for some cool CA pics check out kshermphoto.com link on the right)

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Decision Day 2010

Hello again blog-friends thought I'd write a quick post in case any of you were praying for Dana's 2:30 meeting with the doctors this afternoon. Well, you can pray a little longer, we aren't meeting until 4:00. The doctor called late last night (!), he wouldn't be back until after that time.

He also introduced another surgical choice, unilateral something or other, which will be explained to us more tonight. It seems that endonasal is less and less an option due to the sleep apnea. We will find out tonight what the data from Friday showed but we know enough that it's not a real safe option right now. So we are left with eyebrow incision, unilateral, and going home. The latter seems the most appealing physically but spiritually we are prepared to go through with this and find out whether the tumor is cancer or not. We can look back and see how the Lord has prepared the way for us to be here, and with tons of support from family and friends, it seems to be the right path.

Oops! The doctor's office just called, they want us there at 3:30 instead of 4 so I gotta finish this up real quick (it's 2:35) Too bad, we'll get there when we get there

Anyway the last few days have been a real blessing. The family of Maggie's penpal are really sweet people and we got to spend a lot of time with them, and I think more importantly the girls got to spend a couple days with some kids their own age and be kids for a while. Amazingly, Rachel also got an email from her penpal who is in Michigan the same day we were visiting Maggie's.

And speaking of penpals, Dana has an online friend from Seattle she's been corresponding with for several months who has had several surgeries to remove tumors like these. She has been very helpful ad encouraging to Dana, helping her see things from a patient's perspective. As it turns out...remember Dana's surgery was supposed to be 7am last Friday but they pushed it back to noon because of an emergency surgery? You'll never guess who's it was..... yes, you are a very smart reader! And (are you sitting comfortably?) she is staying at the same hotel as Dana's parents! We hope to meet up with them later. (Hoo-hoo)

As for Dr. Go, the more time we've had this weekend to let the emotions drain away into the Pacific, the more it appears the doctor we were so upset with last week may very well be the one that has saved her life. The whole team knew about and was concerned with the CPAP issue for a while but he raised the post-op concerns that really put a stop to what could have been very, very bad. He was not scheduled for Friday morning, so if Dana's surgery wasn't pushed back until noon then possibly no one would have noticed what Dr. Go did. Get the picture? Clearly the picture is bigger than all of us can see.

I forgot to mention the reason why Dana loves the ocean and water so much. The crashing waves never stop. It remind us of God's love for us. Never-ending.

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I Tell You the View, is Truly Amazing

Well the last couple days we had a chance to get out and enjoy the wonders of God's creation. The kids got a chance to play in the Pacific Ocean  and feel the power of the waves. Dana got to walk on the beach and feel the sand and water between her toes. On the drive east to Riverside we saw snow-capped mountains through the palm-tree lined streets. Sky so blue it defines the color's name. I'm sure lots photos will follow later, one or two here won't d it justice.

Yesterday after church we met up with some more new friends. Maggie has been corresponding with a pen pal that she found through Focus on the Family. Again, it is just like God to prepare the way for us and provide a Christian family to visit with and share life together - their daughter suffered from leukemia a few years ago and the same questions we are asking about not knowing why we're on this path they had already gone through. (Hoo-hoo)

So all the wonders of God's creation has got me thinking about giving you another historical snippet. After the events of the diagnosis from the radiologist (see "Second Glance" from last week) it was time to find a Neurosurgeon. It was plain we were going to see a real specialist, cuz darn it we Delnor, St. Joe's and Sherman Hospitals are very nice but there was no way they were going to operate on my wife's brain.

Rush Univ. has a great reputation so she called there. "Well, our Chief Neurosurgeon has open clinic hours this afternoon, can you come at 2:00?" What?? The number one guy right away? It takes 6 months to see my dentist!! (Hoo-hoo)

So we dropped the kids off at Grammas and plowed through traffic to bring the MRIs to Dr. Byrne. Right away he looked at the scans and looked very concerned. It could be the Meningioma as the radiologist guessed but he thought very strongly it was an Esthesioneuroblastoma (ENB) which "if we catch it this early, you're very fortunate. And don't go looking it up on the internet, it'll scare the crap out of you."

"I could have cancer?!?"

Right away after leaving there she wanted to go to the lake. As a young girl she would spend every summer day at the pool, or ride her bike to Lake Michigan. Water was always her thing. She wanted to see something bigger than herself, and Lake Michigan was the biggest around. She went out on a pier that goes out into the Lake to talk to God alone, because she knew I wouldn't follow her out there (there's sharks and giant squid etc in the water...)

How exactly is this part of God's plan? My daughters are still so young, I'm home-schooling, there are things to do and see, why is this happening??

It's just like God that she got a phone call from a dear friend that was having family stuff going on she needed to talk about. So there they were sharing life together (hoo-hoo) And it is so great to be a part of something when it all comes back full circle; that same friend called yesterday while we were walking on the beach. There is no question in our minds that God is still there walking with us.

It is foolish for us to praise Him only in the "good times" merely because the road ahead seems a little foggy to us. We can only walk by faith, not by sight, strengthened by His glorious might. What joy it will be to look back at all this and say "what were we worried about?"

I really don't know who's reading this and where you are at spiritually, but I encourage you to take the time to look at this natural world that you can see, hear, taste, smell and touch and know that it was not put here by mistake. It was made by Someone who loves you and wants you to enjoy it. Something bigger than yourself, no matter what you're going through. Even when we don't praise Him, the earth cries out His glory.

I'm going to close today's post with excerpt from one of my favorite creation songs, "Truly Amazing" by The Waiting;

Well, the same Big Hands that made me made the biggest skies I've seen. And the same Big Eyes that cry for me are watching every living thing. So the skies they never argue and Creation won't complain. Though She's been victimized and brutalized she shudders only at One Name

                                                            

And I know I've been afraid of every little thing. But today I join Creation when I raise my head and sing

She's opened my eyes, and now I'm where I belong, joined in a song. You're truly amazing!

I'm looking at You, I tell You the view is truly amazing!

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Take Me to the Riverside

I have to admit when we first decided to have the surgery in CA I was very excited that we would be able to go to Greg Laurie's church, Harvest Christian Fellowship in Riverside CA. I've been listening to his radio messages for almost 15 years and receive his daily devotions via Email. Everyone has a favorite pastor, he's mine. He has a gift of explaining things simply but directly.

I had already planned to go this Sunday with the kids, but with the delay in Dana's surgery that meant we got to go together!

Right off the bat we had a Kleenex moment because the first worship song they played was "Salvation is Here" which has the lyrics..

"God above all the world in motion, God above all my hopes and fears. Well I don't care what the world throw at me now, It's gonna be alright! 'Cause I know my God saved the day and I know His word never fails and I know my God made a way for me..."

Dana said she heard this song at our church last week and made a note that she was going to tell me to put it in the blog. Pretty powerful huh? God always speaks to the two of us through music. I have personally always been impacted more through a 3 or 5 minute song from the heart than volumes of books. God brought me to faith through music and keeps me close to Him through it as well. Of course we weren't prepared for the next Kleenex moment.

Greg just returned from a trip to Israel and was preaching that day, but first introduced a new Christian Band called Revive from Australia who played their first radio single called "Blink." Just read these lyrics and tell me whether or not God was speaking to us through them...:

"Teach me to number my days, And count every moment before it slips away. Take in all the colors before they fade to gray. I don't want to miss even just a second more of this

It happens in a blink, It happens in a flash. It happens in the time it takes to look back. I try to hold on tight, but there's no stopping time. What is it I've done with my life?

When it's all said and done, no one remembers how far we have run. The only thing that matters is how we have loved. I don't want to miss even just a second more of this.

Slow down, slow down, before today becomes our yesterday.Slow down, slow down, before you turn around and it's too late.

It happens in a blink, It happens in a flash (etc)

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Brief Encounter

Picked up my Lady from the sleep study this morning and learned that she had a brief encounter with "a real live Christian!" Turns out the sleep tech goes to a real Bible-believing church and they had some amazing conversations. Just more proof that God is at work in her life and keeps placing complete strangers in her path to bring encouragement in times of stress.

We're not sure the data from her sleep study will be sufficient to make an educated decision Tuesday when we go before the group at the hospital. She was supposed to do a split study, half without the CPAP and half with. By the time she was actually able to get to sleep with everything running through her mind, it seemed then it was time to put on the mask. She maybe got 3 hrs of sleep at the most. We'll find out Tues at 2:30 if there's anything they can gleen from it.

I do think it's just like God to put another owl in her path at the sleep clinic. They are, of course, nocturnal.

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